J. Haux

I'm making a note to myself to come back here later and add my review on this post ( Invictus , orb, shepard king 'storybook')

Okay, and my point all along was... If he already found it, why is he still looking? Or: unless you mean something else, those two sentences are a discrepancy, for ...

Okay, let me try to explain. Your first few stanzas are in present tense. The character is talking to the reader, as if he's about to tell about something that ...

It doesn't really feel like poetry, as there's not really a rhythm...Know what? I'll just trust you. :D "I thought he had already found it?": He finds it about three ...

With a weary sigh his essence, his soul rose revisit a time long forgotten. " When he gets particularly emotional his body responds...or something like that. ...Oh--*slaps forehead* It's fine. ...

Out of curiosity, why is this called "Bound for Glory"? It doesn't seem to fit...Samuel Garrison's plight seems to be the opposite... There's a lot of energy in this, I ...

Yes, please do. ~Jacquie~

Sorry, those were my typos--except for 'sunrize'. (please don't be mad, Searria) Searria is my 10-year-old sister. For some reason she can't join, so she's using my account. I'll have ...

Is this the end?

“Yes? Linda that’s absurd! People spend lifetimes trying to change their fate’s but the stars are always one step ahead,” he said passionately. fates She sounded panicked and generally concern

Waiting for more...I've followed this from the beginning.

By the way, I was right about the dialog punctuation. It happens all over: "Do you like guinea pigs?" the girl asked brightly. "I do." as opposed to "Do you ...

First of all.... Let me tell you some things I like about this. I love the flavor and character of your writing! The description is good. The mystery is enticing. ...

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I'm still reading. :)